Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Theseus and the Minotaur "Alternative ending"
"boom, boom." the minotaur was rajing for Theseus. Theseus got paralized, he stood in scilence and in a few moments, he pull out his sword and hurt the minotaur. He grabbed the creature's horns and calmed him down. The monster was soon in control, he got tied up by Theseus and thrown in a big cage. Theseus saved many people and was soon treated as king. The minotaur became a good monster and guarded the town from other blood-sucking beasts and enemies.
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6 comments:
good!!! I like it...
Why are you comenting on yourself?
Ps: Pretty ok
Firstly, why is yours so short?
Secondly, I think you should use more powerful and interesting vocabularies to suit your excellent ending.
Thirdly, it is quite okay but I suggest you to describe things more and add more details to improve it better.
Fourthly, why are you commenting on your own blog?
Adam, we think alike. The vocabulary here is not strong enough to draw the reader in, making them wander about he context of the storyboard. I recommend that you add to this alternate ending and improve it, and check for any mistakes or room for improvement
hahaha lols.....
Why are you commenting yourself?
Short, not interesting vocab, paralysed>
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